December 26 1996

26 Dicembre  1996

In a small, small town in the hills of Calabria,
Its true beauty hidden from the world.
The hills surround me,
breath taking each time I look at them.
Smaller towns scattered across the hills.
In a small town,
full of memories
from many years ago.
Some, difficult to forget.

I remember you,
something about you;
made my heart stop.
Something in your eyes,
that I wanted to see but couldn't.
We were younger;
innocent.
our hopes and dreams were lost in the clouds.

Here I am in this small town again.
Here you are in this same small town.

Both of us older.
But I remember you,
small innocent feelings for you,
come rushing back.
They grow stronger as each day passes.
I know you don't see them,
I can't show them to you.
because I don't understand them;
but they are here
hidden in my heart.

Their true beauty;
hidden from you.
Like this small town.
Its true beauty hidden,
from the rest of the world.

In un piccolo paese, nelle colline della Calabria
la vera bellezza nascosta al mondo.
Le colline mi tolgono il respiro quando le vedo.
Piccoli paesi, sparsi sulle colline.
Un piccolo paese
pieno di ricordi;
di tanti, tanti anni fa.
difficili a dimenticare.

Mi ricordo di te,
qualcosa di te;
ha fermato il mio cuore.
Qualcosa nei tuoi occhi,
che volevo vedere,
ma non potevo.
Eravamo piccoli,
e innocenti.
Con le nostre speranze sulle nuvole.

Sono di nuovo qui in questo piccolo paese;
tu sei ancora qui in questo piccolo paese.

Ora siamo cresciuti;
ricordi di te,
piccoli sentimenti per te,
mi seguono.
Ogni giorno trascorso qui.
I miei sentimenti sono più forti;
non posso mostrartelo,
non posso dimostratelo,
perché non li capisco;
ma sono qui;
nel mio cuore.

La loro bellezza a te nascosta 
è come la vera bellezza di questo piccolo paese,
nascosta al mondo.

Missing You

I woke up this morning thinking about you.
It has been so long since I last saw you.
It has been so long since I last touched you.
All this time has passed us by,
as each day passes I miss you more, and more.
I miss your smile, your lips, your kiss.
I miss your hugs and your touch.
I miss lying awake in your arms, talking, and laughing.
I miss waking up next to you,
I miss watching you sleep so peacefully in my bed.
I miss making love to you.
My dear, I miss you so much I can taste it.
I can feel it, in every breath I take.
You have captured my heart, and soul.
Both are in your hands.
I have fallen completely in love with you.
You are my every thought, my every breath,
my reason to live.
It has been so hard being apart from you.
Soon, I will tell you all of this face to face,
Lying next to you once again.
You are with me today more than ever.
I love you.

Homesick

I watch the rain,
as I sit at a café.
A cigarette in my hand,
a coffee on the table.
In a strange city,
strange and new.
The rain falls quickly,
but quietly.
It reminds me;
of the tears I have shed,
for this is not home.
I watch the people,
quickly walk by me.
No glance in my direction;
no smile on their faces.
I see colourful umbrellas 
And wonder where they are going.
When they see me...
I blend in.
No glance in their direction,
no smile on my face.
I watch the rain,
from my table at this café.
I meet a stranger...
an English speaking stranger.
A few words exchanged.
Ah, the joy of meeting
an English speaking stranger.
Not enough time to chat.
So I say goodbye,
I wish him well and good luck
on his journey.
I sit at my table
Alone again, 
and watch the rain;
and I wonder...
when will I go home?

For You

From the first moment that I saw your smile,
I saw something that I wanted to know,
to understand, to feel.
As each day passed me by,
my thoughts became cluttered;
with thoughts of you.
You immediately cast a spell over my heart,
you captured it in an instant.
Slowly, as time passed you opened my heart,
removing piece by piece;
the wall that surrounds and protects my heart.
My waking thoughts are of you;
my dreams are of you.
Butterflies dance in my stomach;
when I think of you.
The thought of your smile, melts my heart.
I have fallen head over heels for you.
I want to talk to you for hours on end.
I want to listen to you as you speak from your heart and soul.
I want to understand what you think and how you feel.
I want to be part of your dreams and your future.
Most importantly I want to thank you;
for the love you have given me,
and the happiness you have brought into my life.
I love you with all my heart.

Here vs. There

Here I exist,
There I live.
Here I drown in sorrow,
There I float in happiness.
Here I hate,
There I love.
Here I cry,
There I smile.
Here I am lost.
There I am found.
Here I stand out,
There I blend in.
Here I fall backwards,
There I move forward.
Here is my life,
There are my dreams.

November

I can see past your strong front,
things for you aren't as simple
as you make me believe.
I can see your confusion growing,
you can't hide it from me.
I know how you feel,
I've been here before.
Don't push me away,
Let me inside your mind.
Maybe I can help you;
seek what you are trying to find.
Open your heart,
let me see what's inside.
tell me what you are feeling,
let me see the world through your eyes.
I've walked down the path you are travelling on,
it isn't as long as it seems.
You'll find the strength with in you,
to finally reach your dreams.
I want to be here when you need me,
I want you to know I am the one,
I will stand beside you and support you,
In whatever you decide to do,
But you must help me;
so I can help you

Now

I walk again in this city,
where there are the worst memories;
of a period in my past,
That I want to forget so much,
But can't.
Day after day,
I walk alone.
I think alone.
And sometimes
I cry alone.
I look inside of me
and search for the happiness that I had in me.
But I can't find it.,
I can't find myself anymore.
I am not the same girl that everyone knew.
Friends tell me I have changed a lot in this period.
Unfortunately it is true.
I am not as simple as I used to be.
I am not he same girl,
that had so much hope for her life;
so many dreams of a future to share with someone else.
I am not the girl that was waiting to share,
the most beautiful things that life has to offer with you.
The smile in my eyes has faded,
There is only sadness that remains inside of me.
I lost myself
and I can't find me
anywhere.
I want to understand:
What do I have to do to overcome this horrible period?
How do I go forward...?
I know with time...lots of time,
I will find me again.
One day I will be stronger,
and if I wait...
I will see the smile in my eyes
one more time.

Every Morning

Every morning I wake up,
and I hope and pray,
that my memory of you 
is finally gone.
That this hole in my heart,
has gone.
That your words don't hurt me anymore.
Unfortunately it isn't like that.
And I awake each morning,
and you are still there.
Your words cut my heart in two.
You took all my dreams
and destroyed them.
You took my soul;
and left me, alone
with nothing but tears.
You have hurt me more than you can imagine,
believe or feel.
Maybe you feel so big,
because I feel so small,
so fragile and so betrayed.
Maybe you don't feel anything,
maybe you never did.
How must I be?
What must I feel?
I don't understand why I love you.
I don't understand why I am so sad.
It would be better if I could hate you;
for everything you did.
It would be better if I didn't feel anything,
if I was as cold as you.
Every morning,
I try not to miss you anymore,
I try not to love you anymore.
But for now I can't.

Io si

Ricordi:
il primo giorno che ci siamo conosciuti? Io si...
- il nostro primo bacio?
quando mi hai detto di non aver paura?
la prima volta che mi hai detto " Ti Amo"?
la prima volta che siamo stati separati?
Quando ci siamo rivisti?
quanto mi mancavi?
come mi hai baciato?
le notte che abbiamo passato nel mio letto a parlare?
risvegliandoti accanto a me?
la prima volta che abbiamo litigato?
quando abbiamo fatto pace?
la prima volta che ho detto "Ti amo" 
che non mi credevi?
quando sei stato trasferito?
quando abbiamo bevuto sul mio balcone?
la notte prima di partire?
che è stato più difficile separarmi da te?
quando sono andata a casa?
quando sono tornata?
come mi hai abbracciato alla stazione?
quando sono stata con te a Cassino?
il primo bacio al mare?
che mi hai detto che mi proteggi?
che mi hai assicurato che la nostra storia non era un gioco?
che non volevo tornare a Milano?
quando i tuoi sentimenti sono cambiati?
quando avevi bisogno di tempo?
che volevi lasciarmi?
quando sei tornato a Milano perché non volevi perdermi?
il nostro Natale?
la tua promessa?
quando mi hai detto che volevi che ritornassi in Italia?
quando sei stato meno affettuoso con me?
quando sei stato freddo e chiuso?
come mi hai lasciato?
il giorno che mi hai lasciato?
il giorno che non volevi vedermi?
le mie lacrime?
quanto mi hai fatto male?
quando avevo bisogno di te?
il giorno che non potevo vederti?
il giorno che non volevi salutarmi?
come stavo quando sono tornata alla mia patria?
che hai giocato con i miei sentimenti?
tutte le tue bugie?
tutte le tue parole? 
Io si, purtroppo.

Rome 5th March 2003